A few venting letters & a pic

Dear Very Capable Grandparent of the Pre-School Child in My Daughter's Class,

I agree with you that a trip to a pet store less than 1 mile from the preschool leaves little to be desired and that the school obviously did not take into account the numerous children and parents that are effected by pet dander. I was not thrilled with this choice either, but I knew I was going along to make sure my girls behaved themselves and to - apparently - become a shuttle bus for other children (I'll address that in another strongly worded letter). I would assume (silly me) that the other guardians that tagged along would think the same thing of their duties. Obviously - these rules did not apply to you.

You see - ma'am - when I saw you SHOPPING for grooming tools, dog food, and pet carriers on the opposite side of the store than where your grandchild was located it was all I could do not to grab you by your perfectly coiffed granny hair and sling you head first out the automatic doors hoping you would land in some of the pet excrement that always seems to be lingering outside the walls of Pet*Smart. You even had the audacity of pulling aside an employee that was apparently trying to help our group (36 kids + 3 teachers + 20 or so "guardians") through the store during our exhilarating tour of "petdom". I'm sure little Fifi, Fufu, Bitsy, or whatever the inane name of your precious little pet needed some of those items, but I can tell you with ALL assurance that this was NOT the time for a shopping spree.

Lucky for you I was too busy DOING MY JOB of watching over my two children (and sometimes your grandchild) to actually act on that impulse.

Consider this your warning because if I'm on another field trip with you and you pull this crap I will SO end up with some of your hair in my hands!

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Dear Pre-School Parents with only one child to tote to Pet*Smart field trip,

It is well known at our preschool that I have twins and that they are in separate classes. You would think it would be safe for all the other parents to assume that I'm going to have to take both of them in my van.

So - why, oh why do you stand there in silence when the teachers ask if someone can take another child whose parents weren't able to be there to Pet*Smart? I know the one child you are taking (all of 1 mile mind you) must be quite a burden, but suck it up and take another one with you. For the 3rd time I have had to take extra children with me to field trips because no other parent will step up.

This ends now!

For the next field trip you will not only take your child, but you will take mine as well as the teacher (yep, done that too) and I will take my butt to Starbucks for an overpriced hot chocolate.

Oh - and while you are watching my children on the field trip be sure to keep your eye out for a shopping granny. Yank a few hairs for me.

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And here is a pick of the girlies from the Fall Festival our Homeowner's Association had last weekend.

Be afraid...be very afraid...

Not of this spider...

But of who carved it...

ME! Let me tell you, the ACT's were easier than carving this stupid pumpkin. Holy cow! Who knew all that was involved in carving a pumpkin.

Ashlyn was quite the helper and assisted in digging the seeds out of the pumpkin "goo", because we all know that I am SO going to toast those bad boys Martha Stewart style. Yeah - those seeds are still sitting on my kitchen counter. Now - how the heck do I get them all in the toaster?


And Anna? She watched for about 1 minute and then proceeded to play one of her favorite sports which made Chris so proud.

Want to know what happens when you have a full weekend of activities (soccer game, Fall Festival, pumpkin carving, major play time outside)?

Painted Pumpkins and the Stolen Meme

Hmmm...that would make a great book title. Too bad I have absolutely ZERO aspirations of writing a book (unless offered large amounts of money...wink, wink).

First the MeMe - which I stole from DallasK & Rant n Ravin'. These name things are always interesting (at least they are to me).

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet, current car)
Pepper Mazda (my band is the Minivan Mama’s)

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (favorite ice cream, favorite cookie)
Strawberry Chocolate Chip (doesn’t really strike fear does it?)

3. YOUR FLY “GUY/GIRL” NAME:(first initial first name, first 3 letters last name)
S-Rig (not sounding too “fly” to me)

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME:(favorite color, favorite animal)
Blue Giraffe (that just doesn’t even make sense)

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME:(middle name, city where you were born)
Michelle Covington (that one is dead on – hysterical)

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters last name, first 2 letters first name)
Rigsh (sounds like someone trying to hold in a sneeze)

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink and add” the”)
The Yellow Sunkist (my villains quiver in fear)

8. NASCAR NAME:(first names of your grandfathers)
Lewis Ray

9. STRIPPER NAME:(favorite perfume, favorite candy)
Issey Miyake Starburst

10. WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s and father’s middle names)
Louise Edison

And - for your viewing pleasure - a picture of the pumpkins the girls painted yesterday. They worked on them for quite a while even though it looks like they just threw paint at them. Ashlyn was convinced that her pumpkin (the small one) needed more and more orange paint (interesting...). I've never been able to understand comtemporary art!

In Search of the Great Pumpkin!

Here are several photos from the POTATO Pumpkin Farm Event last Saturday. We had a great time.

Seriously?

Dear Mr. Belichick,

You are the head coach for a team that has won the Super Bowl several times under your command. We know you make some cash. Hire a personal shopper or at least see if the Queer Eye guys can pay you a visit. A sweatshirt with the sleeves cut out? Seriously?

And - I'm not a Cowboy's fan - but did you really have to put the nail in the coffin with that last touchdown Sunday? You had already beaten them senseless. Were those extra 7 points really worth it for you?

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Dear College Football Ranking idiots,

I watched the UK vs. LSU game on Saturday. I squealed like a crazy woman when UK won. Last time I checked if one team beats another team that means they are better than that team. Why - oh - why is LSU #4 and UK #7? I don't give a flip about toughness of schedule, % of wins against whichever team, or the price of tea in China. All I know is UK beat LSU and that means we're better!!!!!

I will now take my ball and go home! Or at least I will as soon as I take a huge box of Kleenex to my LSU-loving neighbor - har dee har har.

Wish Lists

As I am already starting to get requests from family regarding our Christmas Wish Lists, I thought I would make it a bit easier this year and post our lists on this blog. This way any generous person wanting to send a gift our way (family, friend, millionaire stranger) will know exactly what we want (wink, wink, nudge, nudge).

The lists are in the right-hand side bar - just scroll down a bit and you'll see them. There is one for me first (of course - I do all the work on this blog so I'm putting my list first dang it!), then the girls' list and then Chris'. Chris is NOTORIOUS for not giving any suggestions for gifts so his list is on the bottom - love ya honey, but you gotta step it up or you're gonna get coal for Christmas - again.

I'm still adding things to the list as I see items we might like so feel free to check back often. AND - I have a birthday coming up in November so feel free to go ahead and purchase any listed gifts for that National Holiday as well.

Team Pics

Saturday was team picture day for the STARS soccer team. I like to affectionately call it "Picture Extortionist Day" as the package prices are a little high - especially for a photo that takes about 2 seconds to shoot - especially when you are having to pay for two soccer players.

I asked if the girls could be photographed together and they were. The other parents told me how great an idea that was and that it would be a precious picture of them together. I wasn't going for cute - I was going for cheap! Two soccer players in one picture = one less package I have to buy.

The professional ones will be much better I'm sure (they had better be!), but here are a few previews. Ashlyn has the black headband on and Anna has the white one.

Monday Morning Mania

We went to the Nashville Zoo on Friday. Apparently there is a new exhibit. Check it out.


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