Dear Diary…

Since my family is currently confined to the house (Chris has contracted h1n1 and is quarantined to our bedroom for 5-7 days – or maybe a little longer if he gives me any “lip”), I have been trying to get some things cleaned out around the house.  I’ve been doing this between setting off Lysol bombs, playing a bazillion hands of Uno with the girls,  and pretending to be the most awesome female gunslinger EVER as I duel with various household surfaces using a spray-bottle of bleach solution.

I came across a box of some of my old things.  One of the most interesting items was my diary when I was 10 through 13-years-old.  I really didn’t have that many entries, but I got a quick snapshot of how my girls will be during those ages.

OH – Mercy!

One entry that stood out was the one below.  It literally made me cringe thinking of the future mother-daughter, door slamming blow-outs that will inevitably occur with my girls.

First, let me defend myself in saying the dances at the Ramada were “THE BOMB” in my hometown, so the fact that they wouldn’t let me go was MAJOR social suicide and totally grounds for my overly-emotional-and-highly-hormonally-charged words.

Second, let me sincerely apologize to my Mother (and Dad too) for this horrible diary entry and for what a pain I must have been at the age of 13.  Yes, Mom – I can practically hear you laughing now thinking of how you can’t wait til I call you telling you of the sagas that will abound when my two are 13.

Laugh it up, Grandma!  (you greatly deserve it)

Time for some Elf-in Fun!

Ah yes…that time of year again…when I waste many a useful minute to create such wonderful entertainment.

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Shelley’s Wish List Item

Chris and I have been watching the Amazon daily “specials” for quite a while now.  These little items came up today, but were already sold out when we came across them.  They were 75% off – quite a deal…until you find out how much they normally cost.  See the video below and pay special attention to the cost she mentions about 22 seconds into this lovely CNET review…

Yes – I want a pair in blue, pink and purple please…

The Mouthpiece is KEY!

I’ll let the video speak for itself, but – as a bit of a background – the Nashville Predators (NHL team for those non-ice sport-fans) put on a 4-week workshop (free – woohoo!) for small kids with no hockey experience a couple times a year.

Yep – my girls were ALL about doing it.

So we went for our equipment fitting last night, and here’s the result…

Guess their favorite part of their equipment…

…the mouthpiece!

Jillian Michaels is trying to kill me!

Seriously…if you wake up one morning and find me face down in a puddle of sweat with my sports bra wrapped around my neck, you will know who to blame.

This chick means business!

I have actually always been a Jillian fan.  I’ve watched several Biggest Loser episodes and kinda giggled when Jillian would make some of the contestants cry (I know, I’m awful). 

I know Bob is the “kinder, gentler” personal trainer, but – frankly – I need someone to kick my ass (sorry, mom – pretend I typed “buttocks” there).  I am a competitive person and I totally thrive when I am challenged – something Miss Michaels is apparently VERY good at doing.

Now my cousin & aunt would tell you they need the sweet encouragement of Bob Harper, and I get that – really, I do.  But that just isn’t what I need to get in shape.

So how do I know Jillian is trying to kill me?

About a week ago I discovered workouts available via our cable “on-demand” service.  Jillian has her own category under Exercise TV.   Of course she does, Exercise TV is scared to death of her and will give her whatever she wants.

Jilli (because we are such good friends – that’s what I call her…then we braid each other’s hair, paint our nails and have a pillow fight – sorry, I digress) has this 20 minute workout program as part of her 30 Day Shred program on the “on demand” channel. 

HOLY MOLY!

Now – despite my Botticelli-esque appearance – I have a fairly active fitness background (stop laughing).  I was a cheerleader in high school (shut it!), taught aerobics and was a swimmer.  I have even finished two half-marathons.  Let me tell ya…Jillian pummeled me into a gooey mush.  That first 20 minute workout was a KILLER.  Shoot – every workout of hers since then has ended with me in the fetal position crying for my mommy.

My one consolation is that Jillian is not very flexible at all.  I do smile a little at my self when I can stretch just a few inches further than she can.  Take that, Miss Michaels!

I have now done 5 of her workouts and I keep coming back for more.  I just hope these workouts will help keep the poundage off – especially while I attempt to inhale an entire sweet potato casserole at Thanksgiving.

I’ll keep you posted…or maybe I won’t if she succeeds in killing me.

Friends Giving Hope

I was recently blessed with the opportunity to help with a phenomenal benefit concert.  The Friends Giving Hope concert was created to assist five Mount Juliet, Tennessee-area children fighting “Stupid Cancer” – Makenzie, Savannah, Bishop, Karli & Thomas. 

Many of you know that a dear friend of mine has a daughter fighting brain cancer.  Actually, fighting is too light of a term – this 9-year-old girl is giving brain cancer a serious WHOOPIN’!!!  Makenzie Matthews is an amazing little girl and her family is just as wonderful.  Her mom – Kathleen – has been my “twin guru” ever since I met her when my children were toddlers.  Makenzie is a twin (Madison is her amazing sister) and has a little brother (Justin) who is the same age as my girls.  Their dad – Wilson – has always been so incredibly sweet to our girls and refers to them as his “second most favorite set of twin girls”.  I can not say enough about this wonderful family, and I was tickled that I could do something to help in some small way.

As several of you are aware, I am a bit of a computer nerd (shut it!).  I love messin’ around in the graphic design programs and PowerPoint is a definite favorite.  Yes – I realize many of you are dozing off right now due to my extensive description of my “Nerd-ness”.  Well suck it up and grab some caffeine.

Ok, ok…I won’t bore you any longer…below is the slideshow presentation I did for the benefit concert.   Some of it just lists area businesses and individuals who helped sponsor the event or donated silent auction items – that probably won’t be of much interest to those of you outside this area of Tennessee, but I encourage you to watch all of it so you can see the beautiful faces of these amazing kids and their families.

I am truly blessed to have been a part of this event.  Enjoy.

The Force (and the candy) Are With Us

One night, a long, long, long time ago (actually, just about 3 hours – but that is an eternity for 6-year-olds), two opposing forces met on the subdivision battlegrounds of Tennessee.

The first – a newly trained Clone Wars soldier – Ahsoka.

 

Ahsoka was well-trained and exceptionally well-dressed.  I mean – man – who created that masterful work of art she is wearing?  That saint woman must have extraordinary tailoring talent.   She must have been up til 1am with Diet Coke streaming through her veins at least two nights just making sure this powerful young lady battled in style.

The second – a veteran leader and smooth operator – Darth Vader.

Darth Vader (or “DV” as her peeps call her) is also well-trained and stealthily dressed.  No fancy duds for this dudette!  The tailor of this outfit was thrilled to death that the only thing she had to do was visit the nearest Death Star (aka Hell-Mart) and pick up the “DV standard”.  The tailor kissed DV right on her chrome dome for making such a wise (and sew-less) clothing choice.

So this was it – the battle of the overpriced candy…

Who would come out on top?  Would anyone get hurt?  More importantly – would the tailor get paid in Butterfingers and Skittles like she requested?

The battle started!

The battle was intense!  The battle was tiring!  The battle took for freakin’ ever! (C’mon girls – we have candy to get!  Can we PLEASE get our shoes on and head out!?!)

Finally, the tailor got involved because – let’s face it – a woman without her promised chocolate & sugar is just vicious!  And this woman – lovely as she was – was actually a witch, and was ready to move the fight along so she could collect her Butterfinger & Skittles.

So she attacked them both – hypnotizing them with her witchy tights (which also made her legs look like some sort of oversized voodoo sausages).

This actually made DV & Ahsoka forget their differences and join together to beat the evil (yet, strikingly attractive) witch. 

Once the witch was banished, the two girls became great friends…

…and what better way to celebrate a new friendship?  Why, by enjoying LOTS…

…and LOTS…

   of candy!

And they all lived happily ever after – except the witch.  She got hooked up with some candy cigarette smokin’ degenerate…

 (I mean REALLY?!?  They tried to pass these candy cigarettes off as “candy stix”!  Yeah, right!  Even better – we got these at our church’s Trunk or Treats event – lovely.)

The Monster Mash

I adore JibJab!  Grandpa (my Dad) was made honorary Dr. Frankenstein since he was here tonight.  Hysterical!

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

Not me, Monday!

Yes - it is once again time to prance about reindeer style and shout from the rooftops how perfect I am (I'm no Freud, but me thinks I have Christmas on the brain - "reindeer", "rooftops"...), and how I would NEVER be caught doing some of the things listed below.  No, no, no...Not me!

I would never retire from my POTATO Presidency and become the slacker member who doesn't read all the details of the Pumpkin Farm Event details and show up 1 1/2 hours late.  Nope, not me.

I would also never pout like a 4-year-old when I discovered the dessert table at the Pumpkin Farm Event had been removed by the time we ate our picnic lunch.  My husband would do no such thing either. 

There is NO WAY I would totally snag the last fall decorated Little Debbie Snack Cakes package lingering so sadly on the now non-existent dessert table for myself, stash it in our picnic bag and then eat them later without so much as a word to the "critters" (my nickname for the girls). Hey!  They had some of the cookies I made from scratch purchased from a fine organic establishment down the road.  Fine!  It was Hell-Mart!  Stop judging me!

I most certainly DID NOT scream sorority-girl-in-a-cheesy-horror-movie-wearing-only-a-bra-and-thong-and-pigtails style when I saw there were only about 80 days left til Christmas, and remember I only have about three presents purchased.  REMINDER:  Must get Christmas gift spreadsheet updated.  ANOTHER REMINDER:  Must stop admitting to having Christmas gift spreadsheet (that goes with me everywhere once the Christmas shopping officially begins).

I did not have one of the biggest "aaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww" moments EVER last night when I was given the most amazing gift of seeing two brand new baby twin girls up close and personal in the NICU.  Thanks to our dear friends and brand new parents, Amy & Nathan, for giving me that opportunity.

Nope - wouldn't do any of those items mentioned above.  Nope, nope, nope...

Pics from the Pumpkin Farm

We had a fantastic time at the POTATO Pumpkin Farm Event yesterday.  We LOVE pumpkin farms and have been every year since the girls were babies. 

From the town of Nash-Rock…

Ashlyn has been home sick the past few days.  Most of our days home from school have been spent doing origami, reciting the periodic table, practicing our Beethoven pieces on the piano and perfecting our soufflé recipe. 

Yeah, right…

We’ve been watching cartoons (consisting mostly of SpongeBob), playing the Wii and seeing how long we can stay in our pajamas til they start to smell funny (2.2 days, by the way).

We had a “throw back” hour today when Ashlyn found the original episodes of Tom & Jerry on the Cartoon Network. 

Here’s what happened next…

______________

Me:  Ashlyn, I used to watch Tom & Jerry when I was a little girl.

Ashlyn:  Really?!?

Me:  Yeah, I loved it.

Ashlyn:  That was a long time ago, right?

Me:  Mm-hmm, several years ago.

Ashlyn:  Yeah, back in the prehistoric.  You know…in the 90’s.

______________

I wanted to laugh and cry all at the same time.

The Riggs Family Goes to the Fair

Yes – cheesy title.

Yes – cheesy videos.

Yes – doing this to make the grandparents happy (Christmas is right around the corner people).

This first one is from when we were in the chicken barn at the Wilson County Fair. 

This is from the fun house.  You may wonder why I didn’t help them get out of the fun house spinning wheel…

 

Well…helping them would keep me from getting funny video of them.  Geez!

Panda Bear, Panda Bear…

The 1st & 2nd Grade Book Parade was this evening.  Since Ashlyn has been under the weather, Anna and I headed to the parade by ourselves.  After hitting up the Book Fair for some highly priced educational books, we made our way to the school’s “green room” of sorts prior to the parade.  This is where we joined the other dressed up 1st graders.

Here are the results of Anna's Oscar-worthy performance and my - also Oscar-worthy - costuming and makeup abilities:

Translation:  Hi, My name is Panda Bear from Panda Bear, Panda Bear, What Do You See written by Bill Martin Jr.

Yes - those are wrist guards from my roller blading days (stop laughing) that she added to her costume as we left through the garage.  I totally think it "makes" the outfit, don't you?

Even though Ashlyn was not able to do the show (she has been sick the past 3 days), she had to get in on some acting action.  This "scene" is her as the hunter killing the poor endangered panda bear with her AK47 Rifle.  mmmm...hmmmmm...

Oh Porky…you did not die in vain…

I can’t say I’ve been to many pig roasts.  Actually, I’m not sure if I had ever been to a pig roast before yesterday.  I just love trying new things…

We packed up our lawn chairs, our cooler, the pasta salad I made, and the girls, and headed over to a neighbor’s house down the street.  They were kind enough to invite us over and we never turn down a free meal – especially a free meal I don’t have to cook.

A good time was had by all.  We met some new people, revisited with some neighbors we haven’t seen in a while and the girls wore themselves out playing with all the other “kids” (I originally had “kiddies” here and the girls had a fit watching me type it – dang it – why did they have to learn how to read).

Here are a few more pics from our afternoon of carnivorism:

Ashlyn couldn’t be bothered with putting the roll down for a picture.  Anna was pleased as punch to put on her winning smile.

I love this picture, but Chris says he “looks old”.  I think he’s nuts.  What a cutie!

Ok, men – how many of you does it take to cut up that pig?!?  You should have heard them planning the attack.  And there were WAY too many knives being waved around at this point – especially since most of them had already imbibed a beer or 2 (or 12).

It started raining at one point (luckily, after the pig massacre had already occurred) and we all ran inside – except for several kids (yes – including ours after a bit) that decided jumping on a trampoline in a downpour was a good idea.  We’re raising some smart kids in the South, I tell ya!  Anna and I took time out for a picture on the stairs.

So – dear piggy – we appreciate you sacrificing your life so we could (“EAT YOU” – Ashlyn just screamed in my ear) enjoy each other’s company and spend a wonderful Saturday afternoon.

Side Note:  I told the girls before we went over there that they would be catching the pig so we could cook it.  They actually started strategizing this endeavor before I finally told them I was kidding.  “Anna, you grab its tail and I’ll knock it in the head with my baseball bat!”  “Ashlyn, you corner it under the trampoline, and I’ll punch it in the nose.”

No ma'am...ain't no rednecks here!

What do you do in the South during football season and you can’t find your hat that holds the pop/beer cans that you can drink out of….

Why…you make your own, of course!

Murderers & Thieves = BAD / Lunch Lady = GOOD

A little background…the main glory of moving from Kindergarten to 1st Grade is you are finally given the permission to purchases ice cream as a part of your school lunch. Let’s face it – there isn’t much glory in being a 1st grader, so this is equivalent to me being given the keys to the Diet Coke machine in our office. (Hold on a second – I need to daydream about that for just a bit.)

This is supposed to be a treat.

A treat not necessarily enjoyed EVERY day.

My children did not get this memo.

To their credit, if I had a blank check (we put money into an account they use to pay for their daily lunch) and was offered ice cream, I would definitely take it. I mean, who wouldn’t?

We had no idea the girls were doing this almost every day until I recently checked their lunch account and I was able to print a report showing me their daily spending habits. Mmm…hmmm…very interesting report.

So we had a chat with mini-Ben & Jerry, and explained that ice cream is a “treat” and does not need to be enjoyed every day at school. Yes – they looked like deer in the headlights over that revelation, but they finally came to and understood what we were trying to tell them. We told them they could get it two times a week and they could pick those two days of the week. If they abused this privilege, we would not allow them to get ice cream at all. This brought on a whole other discussion about which days they wanted it. Just another one of those moments where we see how much like Chris Anna is and how much like me Ashlyn is.

Anna fretted over the decision for a good 10 minutes and decided to hoard her ice cream til the last two days of the week. Ashlyn was trying to figure out if she could actually use both her ice cream “days” on Monday – no clue where she gets that impulsiveness (har dee har har).

Having explained all this – the most important thing to remember is that ice cream, the lunch room and the lunch ladies (who hand out this beloved ice cream) have been popular topics of discussion lately.

This morning the girls were laying in our bed waiting on me and Chris to finish getting ready. The news was on and there was a story presented about a man who shot and killed two people during a robbery. Now – I am not winning Parent of the Year any time soon, but I will take certain opportunities like this and make them a learning experience if I think about it quickly enough. As I slipped on my shoes, I told the girls, “See girls, there are some very bad people in this world which is why we always want you to be careful and make wise choices. There are also lots of good people too, but …”

I didn’t even get the last part of that sentence out before Ashlyn said, “Good people – like the lunch lady!” Anna immediately agreed and all Chris and I could do was look at each other and start cracking up. Yep – the lunch lady now ranks right up there with Santa, the Tooth Fairy & the Easter Bunny now. We’re so proud.

Not Me Monday (and including several Mondays I've missed)

1. I most certainly HAVE NOT missed a plethora (I just love that word...say it 3 times fast with me: plethora, plethora, plethora - I just love it) of opportunities to post items on this blog. I have truly fallen of the wagon and am doing all I can to get my butt back on that sucker.

2. I also most certainly DO NOT have some sort of freakish affection for the word "plethora".

3. I DID NOT bring two popular vampire movies back to my buddy at church a few weeks ago. I did wrap them up in brown plastic bags so as to not offend any non-vampire loving Baptists. Yep - was just waiting for the lightening to strike...

4. I definitely did not make my daughter sing “All I Want for Christmas…” after she lost her two front teeth recently – just for giggles. I also don’t encourage her to say any words containing “s” or “th” just for laughs. (Hey - she's a ham and loves the attention - no idea where she gets that.)

5. We (yep – I’m throwing Chris under the bus for this one too) did not take the girls out of school a couple Fridays ago to go to an amusement park. Hey – it was educational! We had to count how many times we rode each ride and estimate how many spinning rides my dad would have to ride to make him throw up. There was also motor skills testing involved (the shoot-em-up Scooby Doo ride tested our laser shooting accuracy and encouraged healthy competition – dang it). PS – I totally KICKED BUTT on that ride.

6. I absolutely DID NOT forget to mention that my parents met us King’s Island in Cincy for our day of fun, and then receive the scolding of a lifetime from my mother for not mentioning said parents in my blog post about that day. Yes – my parents were with us. Yes – they rode many rides. Yes – I actually heard my mother squeal with glee on the kiddie roller coaster. Yes – I totally laughed my butt off when the ride my Dad first rode with us started spinning and then almost pee my pants when he said, “hmmm…maybe I should have watched what this ride did before getting on it”. Yes – I totally should have written a sonnet praising them for their wonderful-ness as they watched the girls that night so Chris and I could go back and ride the “big” rides. Instead, dear parents, please accept this haiku as a symbol of our thanks...

Dear parents of mine

We had such fun and great laughs

Let's do it again

7. I would never giggle uncontrollably when my water-phobic hubby (I’m talking Wicked Witch of the West hatred of being wet) got drenched on the White Water Canyon ride – twice.

8. I did not tell the man (obviously from the North) sitting next to me at "Wicked" the following after hearing him bitch and moan to his wife (obviously from the South) about "the south". "You know what you can do if you don't like the South? LEAVE!" His wife about fell out of her seat.*

* He actually laughed when I said it too, so it was all in good fun.

9. I have not already watched this new "New Moon" preview 5 times this morning:

All I want for Christmas...

You may call it slight child abuse...I call it humor...

Out of the mouths of babes...

Random bits of WAY overdue info...

1. I am not even going to pretend I haven't been on here for two months. I will only hang my head in shame and beg forgiveness (mostly from my mother-in-law & Courtney who are relentless little boogers).

2. I'm going to see Wicked tonight with my good buddy, Courtney. It is very possible she will have to hold me down from jumping up and singing with the cast (I've been listening to the soundtrack for months), but - knowing her - she will totally shove me right up on stage with them.

3. We went to the Wilson County Fair a couple weeks ago. This fair is AWESOME and is considered the state fair of TN (because - apparently - the real state fair bites). Here are a couple pics from that day.













4. I got my hair "did" a couple weeks ago (that's "southern speak" for "I have a new hairdo"). I'm very happy with the results. I may even go "wild" in the winter with some darker color - I know you're on the edge of your seat...

5. I started back to "regular" work hours now that the girls are back in school. This means the house is a mess, and my "to do" list has grown TREMENDOUSLY. At least it keeps me out of trouble (for now). Of course, it also keeps me from blogging...

6. We went to Cincinnati last weekend and visited King's Island. Man - I forgot how much fun it is to ride the Beast! I have LOTS of pics from that, but will post those separately. I'm still impressed Chris and I rode the brand new coaster - the Diamondback - I screamed the entire ride (twice). Plus, the girls were able to sleep on the "magic bed" (their term for the pull-out sofa at hotels) all weekend. I'm so glad my children are entertained so easily.

7. We spent one evening in Cincy with my college buddy - Kari - and her wonderful family. SO MUCH FUN! Every time we see them, we want to move back North.

8. We also helped with a yard sale at my cousin's house. I brought hats for everyone to wear (nothing like a festive yard sale staff to bring in the buyers), and here's what I picked out for my Dad and Uncle (aka - The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything). These pictures are SO going to come back and haunt them...

9. I'm addicted to this site. She is VERY crafty, but presents it in a way where I actually believe I can do the things she's done. Realistically, I know I'll probably never do them, but it is nice to know it is possible.

That's all for now, but I have many more thoughts & pics to post. I won't make any promises, but I will try to do better. :-)